fat.

for those who do not know,i am fat.yeah like really fat.and being a fat person, the most frequently asked question for me is 

'bila nak kurus?'

'taknak diet ke?'

'macam makin gemuk je?'

and etc etc

kalau orang kurus tak suka orang gemuk,ingat orang gemuk suka ke?not that i hate myself.its just that i am comfortable being me.TAPI.orang buat aku tak suka diri sendiri.at one time i love myself being cute (denial mode) and another time i fell like omaigod you are fat nora you dont look good in anything everybody is beautiful except you.

tipu lah kalau aku cakap tak teringin nak kurus.but then i love food.and they love me too.haha.okay seriously.i hate those diet that i only can eat one time and i have to starve for the whole night etc etc.i read some articles and they said that i should have enough calories for me to do my daily activities so why on earth i cannot eat?!

actually as a fat person i love to do activities you know?i love jogging (read:walking) .i love those home workout plank lunges jump rope and whatsoever.TAPII.i prefer doing the activities especially jogging with someone.i've been to denai larian alone and joging sorang2 suck you know?i'm being too paranoid that each people who jog beside me was saying something bad at me.

'euww lemak bergerak'

'dah gemuk baru nak joging?'

padahal they dont even notice me pftt.paranoid much huh? back in perlis it was easier for me to do those activities.dalam bilik sorang2 apadahall nak lompat macam mana pun.and i have eton to teman me joging (more like walking actually but fast walk ehehehe) .tapiii kat sini duduk apartment.kang aku lompat satu bangunan bergegar T_T .nak joging pun tasik jauhh.i'm not giving excuses but joging kat tempat yang sepatut wayy much better than joging around blok.more people looking.kat tasik tu semua buat hal masing2. *toomanyexcuseshuh?*

next week balik rumah.lets see if aku rajin ke tak nak buat activity.